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  • Alexandra Filia

Why do men GHOST? What to do when he disappears?


So you’ve gone on a few dates with him and you can’t get enough. Even when you’re not together, he’s texting you. He feels strong and present and REALLY into this.

Then one day…

He disappears.


He has lost his phone is your first thought. Then a day passes and you start thinking that you said/did something to put him off. You re-read all the texts to try to decipher the hidden message that would have prepared you for this. Has he gone into his "man cave"? It is possible, but this should not last more than a week.



There a few reasons for the ghosting, and the primary one is that in his mind he is not in a relationship. Men take several months before they deem a relationship exclusive and agree to the title of the boyfriend. What you should do is hold your horses and continue dating until you know where he really stands. As for the sex, take it easy and hold off to avoid crying in your pillow for a guy who is either not that in to you, or is not ready for a relationship.


Have you been doing too much pursuing? Going out of your way for him? Over-texting? This is a sure way to get him to do a "Houdini". Lay off the communicating and give him a chance to hunt you down, catch you and take you in his lair.


He may also be in a transitional phase, too busy for a relationship or plainly a low class idiot.


What ever the reason for the disappearance, there is only one sensible response. Make yourself scarce. give your texting fingers a rest and hold on to your heart for now. Good luck!

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